What Are Some Funny Jokes Biography
source(google.com.pk)
Q: What did Winnie The Pooh say to his agent?
A: Show me the honey!
Q: Why couldn't the pirate play cards?
A: Because he was sitting on the deck!
Q: What's the difference between bird flu and swine flu?
A: If you have bird flu, you need tweetment. If you have swine flu, you need oink-ment.
Q: Why did the traffic light turn red?
A: You would too if you had to change in the middle of the street!
Q: What did one elevator say to the other elevator?
A: I think I'm coming down with something!
Q: What do you call a window that raps?
A: 2PANEZ
Q: Why can't your nose be 12 inches long?
A: Because then it would be a foot!
Q: What has four wheels and flies?
A: A garbage truck!
Q: What starts with a P, ends with an E, and has a million letters in it?
A: Post Office!
Q: What did the blanket say to the bed?
A: Don't worry, I've got you covered!
Q: Why should you take a pencil to bed?
A: To draw the curtains!
Q: What does the Lone Ranger say when he takes out the garbage?
A: To the dump, to the dump, to the dump dump dump.
Q: How many books can you put in an empty backpack?
A: One! After that its not empty!
Q: What kind of button won't unbutton?
A: A bellybutton!
Q: What do you call an 80s synth pop band with a scoop of ice cream?
A: Depeche a la Mode.
Q: Why do sea-gulls fly over the sea?
A: Because if they flew over the bay they would be bagels!
Q: What dog keeps the best time?
A: A watch dog.
Q: Why did the tomato turn red?
A: It saw the salad dressing!
Q: What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
A: It let out a little wine!
Q: What did the judge say when the skunk walked in the court room?
A: Odor in the court.
Q: What did the fish say when he swam into the wall?
A: Dam!
Q: Why don't skeletons fight each other?
A: They don't have the guts.
Q: What do you call cheese that is not yours?
A: Nacho Cheese
Q: What streets do ghosts haunt?
A: Dead ends!
Q: Did you hear about the astronaut who stepped on chewing gum?
A: He got stuck in Orbit.
Q: What did the penny say to the other penny?
A: We make perfect cents.
Q: Why did the man with one hand cross the road?
A: To get to the second hand shop.
Q: Why did the boy sprinkle sugar on his pillow before he went to sleep?
A: So he could have sweet dreams.
Q: Did you hear about the painter who was hospitalized?
A: Reports say it was due to too many strokes.
Q: Why did the robber take a bath?
A: Because he wanted to make a clean getaway.
Q: What happens if life gives you melons?
A: Your dyslexic
Q: What did the judge say to the dentist?
A: Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth.
Q: Why did the boy tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?
A: He didn't want to wake the sleeping pills!
Q: What goes up when the rain comes down?
A: An umbrella.
Q: Why did the belt go to jail?
A: Because it held up a pair of pants!
Q: Did you hear about the calendar thief?
A: He got 12 months; they say his days are numbered
Q: What happens if life gives you melons?
A: Your dyslexic
Q: What did one raindrop say to the other?
A: Two's company, three's a cloud
Q: Why did the balloon burst?
A: Because is saw a lolly pop
Q: Did you hear about the sick juggler?
A: They say he couldnt stop throwing up!
Q: What did the stamp say to the envelope?
A: Stick with me and we will go places!
Q: Who can shave 10 times a day and still have a beard?
A: A barber.
Q: What do you call a horse that can't lose a race?
A: Sherbet
Q: What do you call a dentist in the army?
A: A drill sergeant
Q: Did you hear about the new Johnny Depp movie?
A: It's the one rated Arrrr!
Q: Why does a milking stool have only 3 legs?
A: Because the cow has the utter.
Q: What's easy to get into but hard to get out of?
A: Trouble
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