Friday 12 July 2013

Hindi Funny Jokes Free Pictures Images Photos Designs 2013

Hindi Funny Jokes Biography

source(google.com.pk)
Sardar Ji: Hamne Mobile Marriage Bureau shuru kiya hai: "Rishtey k liye 1 dabaye, Mangni k liye 2 dabye, Shadi k liye 3 dabye."
Man: Hum Dusri Shadi k liye kya dabaun?
Sardar Ji: Dusri shadi k liye pehle wali ka gala dabye ..! 
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Bhongasing ek ped per chadh Gaye.
Upar baithey Monkey ne poocha: Upar kyon aaye?
Bhongasing: Apple khane.
Monkey: Yeh to aam ka ped hai.
Bhongasing: Pata hai, Apple saath laya hun. 
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Saas (bahu se): Bhagwan ne tumhe 2-2 aankhe di. Chawal me se 2-4 pathhar nahi nikal sakti kya.
Bahu: Very funny! Bhagwan ne tumhe 32 daant diye 2-4 pathhar bhi nahi chaba sakti ? 
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Raja Pervaiz Ashraf: Yaar mujhey Mother's Day pe koi Message nhi aaya?
Secretary: Sir, Pakistan me jub Light jati hai,
Log aap ki Maa ko hi yaad kertey hain!!! 
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Desi Maalik Makaan: OK, mein tumko kiraya dene ke liye aur 3 din ki mohlat deta hun.
Kirayedar: Theek hai ji, mein Diwali, Holi aur Chrismas ke 3 din select karta hoon. 
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Lalu ji ek mahina obama ke pas se engish ki training lekar vaps aaye
ek din unhe ek call aaya. lalu ji bole "Who is speaking?". jawab aaya "Hum Sasura Obama bol raha hun". 
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Boy: Tu Dharti Pe Chahe Jahan Bhi Rahe Gi,  
Tujhe Teri Khushbu Se Pehchan Loonga...
Girl: Mujhe Pehle Se Pata Tha, Tum Kuttay Ho... 
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dad:result ka kya hua
Son: Dad, ek good news hai aur aik bad news
Dad:good news bata.
Son : mai pass ho gya.
Dad : great, aur bad news.
Son:good news galat hai. 
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ek operation ke baad patient bola:
'doctor sahab Kya ab main aap logo se mukt hu?'
Beta doctor to neeche reh gye, main to Yamraj hun!!!!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
husband-talak lena hai,
advocate-talak lene ke liye 5000rp lagenge,
husband-pagal ho kya?pandit ne 51rp me shadi kari thi.
advocate-dekh liye na saste ka Natija!!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Girlfriend (boyfriend se): Ab hame shaadi kar leni chahiye.
Boyfriend: Voh to theek hai... par hum se shaadi karega koun?
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Waiter-Apne samose aur pakodon ko andar se kha liya, lekin bahar ka saara chhod diya! Aisa kyon?Customer-Kyonki doctor ne kaha hai, bahar ka khaana mat khao..
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Santa : matlbi dost se bach kar raho.
Banta : magar matlbe dost ka pta kaise chalega. Santa=simple,sare dosto ko msg karojo reply na de samjah lo wo hi matlbi hai.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Banta dairy likh raha tha
"aaj meri behan ko baccha hone wala hai pata nahi ladka hoga ya ladki,
isliye mujhe ye bhi pata nahi ki me mama banunga ya mami".
Biwi ko padhaunga
Santa : pehle me apni biwi ko BA karwaunga fir MA fir Phd karwaunga fir badiya si naukri dilwaunga.
Banta : fir acha sa rishta dekh k uski shaadi bhi krwa diyo.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Cigarette
santa apne father k samne cigrate pi raha tha
Logon ne kaha ke aap apne father ke samne cigratte pi rahay ho?
Santa bola : Wo mera father hai, koi petrol pump thodi.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Imagine
Interviewer : Imagine, in a closed room, how can you escape if it caught fire?
Santa : Simple, Stop imagining.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Santa fell out
Q: Why did Santa fall out the window ?
A: He was ironing the curtain
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Brake fail
Santa Ki Biwi : O ji Car ki speed itani kyo badha di..?
Santa : Are Banoo Car ki break fail ho gayi hai, To accident ho jaye iske pehele ghar pahunch jaate hai.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Banta fell in love
Banta fell in love with a porno star and married her. He got an opportunity to watch one of her movie.... the Movie came to an End.
A bit disturbed and annoyed with what he saw, Banta told himself, "Thank God it was just a movie and not reality."
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Fighting
santa banta were fighting after exam.
Sir: Y r u fighting?
santa : This fool left the answer sheet blank,
Sir: So what?
santa: Even i did the same thing, now teacher will think that we both copied.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The Plane Ride
Santa traveling 1st time in plane going to BOMBAY,
while landing, he shouted : "BOMBAY-BOMBAY",
air hostess : " B-silent please ",
santa said : " OMBAY - OMBAY.....!!!!!!!! "
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Santa's Underwear
Santa goes to buy a underwear. On choosing one he asks: How much for this?
Shopkeeper: Rs 500
Santa: Arey bhai daily waer dikhaao, Party wear nahin chahiye.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Nishana
Banta : Praji, Jab Main Paida Hua Tha To Military Walon Ne 21 Topein Chalayeen Thi.
Santa : Kamaal Hai ! Sab Ka Nishana Kayse Chook Gaya ..?
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Matlab
Santa meets his friend Bunta
Santa : A & B, A & B, A & B, A & B, A & B...!
Bunta : Oye, Iska Matlab ?
Santa : Kuch Nahin Yaar, I Mean Long Time No C..!
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Speed Breaker
Santa : Drinking-n-Driving Dono Nalo Naal Nai Ho Sakde.
Banta : Kyoo Ji ?
Santa : Je SpeedBbreaker Aa Gaya Taa Peg Dul Jau.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Phone Ki Ganti
Santa : Phone Mere Liye Ho To Kehna Mein Ghar Pe Nahin Hoon.
Jasmeet : Wo Ghar Pe Hain.
Santa : Maine Mana Kiya Tha Ke...
Jasmeet : Phone Mere Liye Tha!
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Awaaz
Santa : Aapne Nurse Bahut Changi Rakhi Hai, Uska Haath Lagtey Hi Mein Theek Ho Gaya.
Doctor: Jaanta Hoon, Thappad Ki Awaaz Mujhe Bhi Sunai Di Thi.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Lucky
Santa : Oh Yaar Main Badi Mushkil Mein Hoon...Meri Biwi Mujhse Ek Pappi Ka Ek Rupeya Leti Hai..!
Banta : Oh Yaar Tu Bada Lucky Hai, Auron Se To Woh 5 Rupye Leti Hai.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dost Hi Dost Ke Kam aata hai
Santa : Yaar! Main Apna Purse Ghar Bhool Aaya, Mainu 1000 Rs Chahide Si.
Banta : Dost Hi Dost De Kam Aunda Hai, Le 10 Rs, Riksha Kar Te Purse Le Aa.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I Love You
Banta : Wo Ladki Deaf Lagti Hai. Main Kuch Kehta Hoon, Woh Kuch Aur Hi Bolti Hai.
Santa : Kaise?
Banta : Maine Kaha I Love U, To Woh Boli 'Maine Kal Hi Naye Sandal kharide hain'
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Kauwa Toh
A crow shits on Banta. Preeto gives tissue paper to him.
Banta: Koi Fhayda Nahin, Kauwa Toh Udd Gaya ..!
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
fight
Santa : When I get mad at you, you never fight back. How do you control your anger?
Jasmeet : I clean the toilet bowl.
Santa : How does that help?
Jasmeet : I use your toothbrush!
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Drink quickly
Sardar & his wife buy coffee in a shop.
Sardar says... Drink quickly..... .
Wife asks why...
sardar says hot coffee Rs5 and cold coffee Rs10.

Hindi Funny Jokes Free Pictures Images Photos Designs 2013

Hindi Funny Jokes Free Pictures Images Photos Designs 2013

Hindi Funny Jokes Free Pictures Images Photos Designs 2013

Hindi Funny Jokes Free Pictures Images Photos Designs 2013

Hindi Funny Jokes Free Pictures Images Photos Designs 2013

Hindi Funny Jokes Free Pictures Images Photos Designs 2013

Hindi Funny Jokes Free Pictures Images Photos Designs 2013

Hindi Funny Jokes Free Pictures Images Photos Designs 2013

Hindi Funny Jokes Free Pictures Images Photos Designs 2013

Hindi Funny Jokes Free Pictures Images Photos Designs 2013

Hindi Funny Jokes Free Pictures Images Photos Designs 2013

No comments:

Post a Comment