Saturday 13 July 2013

Cute Funny Jokes Free Pictures Images Photos Designs 2013

Cute Funny Jokes Biography

source(google.com.pk)
My girlfriend has just left me saying I spend too much time devoted to my studies of Roman Numerals. I’m L I V I D. 

What's the difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer? The taste. 

It's Christmas morning and as the little boy comes down the stairway, he sees his Dad in his nightshirt arranging presents under the tree. "Hi Dad! Who's getting the bagpipes?" 
If you have diarrhea, never trust a fart. 

What do you call a grizzly bear with no teeth? A gummy bear. 

Why can't you get cell phone service when you're naked? No shirt, no shoes, no service. 
What do dwarves use to cut their pizza? Little Caesars. 

A farmer wants to know how many sheep he has in his field, so he asks his border collie to count them. The dog runs into the field, counts them and runs back to the farmer. The farmer says, "How many?" The dog says, "40." The farmer is surprised and says, "How can there be 40 - I only bought 38!" The dog says, "I rounded them up." 

Caffeine is proof that God loves us and wants us to pay attention. 

The Lenscrafter technician got his tie caught in the machine and he made a spectacle of himself. 

If it wasn't for pickpockets, I'd have no sex life at all. 

Where does virgin wool come from? Ugly sheep? 

I've got some Carefree gum, but it hasn't kicked in yet. I'm worried. 

If you're killed by a wild pig, does that mean you were boared to death? 

Walking can add minutes to your life. That enables you at 85 to spend an additional 5 months in the nursing home at $7,000 per month. 

Marriage isn't a sprint, it's a marathon. I've run a marathon, and I was happy when it was over! 

Quasimodo is sitting in the kitchen when his mother comes in, carrying a wok. He says, "I love Chinese food!". Quasimodo's mother says, "No, I'm going to use this to iron your shirts!" 

It's always I before E. Isn't that weird? 

I ordered a honeymoon salad. It's lettuce, alone. 

Mexican firefighters are always paired up - Jose and Hose B. 

Politicians should serve two terms. One in office, one in prison. 

If you want more time, wear more watches. 

If you give someone a piece of your mind, are you left with peace of mind? 

A sign in a store read "Only sightseeing dogs allowed". I wonder if you put a Hawaiian shirt and a camera on your dog, if he could get in. 

Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried to slam a revolving door. 

A man was arrested for dressing up like a woman. He was charged with male fraud. 

Time is what keeps everything from happening all at once. 

People from New York are called New Yorkers. Are people from Hamburg called Hamburgers?  

If you're going to try cross-country skiing, start with a small country. 

About a month before he died, my grandmother covered my grandfather with lard. After that, he went downhill very quickly. 

Why did the chicken cross the road? To prove to the squirrels it could be done. 

When my ship comes in, I'll be at the airport. 

A man got a blood transfusion, but the hospital ran out of blood - so substituted borscht. Now his heart never skips a beet

What did Ernie say when his best friend asked him if he wanted some ice cream? "Sure, Bert!" 

I like bananas, but they lose their appeal quickly. 

A Diagram in A Book Was Not Clear
So da Teacher Drew The Diagram On Da Blackboard
&
said:
“Dont Look At The Book Figure,Look At My Figure”

Children use it 4 chewing

Illiterate people use it 4 sign

Winners 4 victory
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.
AND
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My FANS use it 4 reading my messages
.
.
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.
Oh….u toooo?

Cute Funny Jokes Free Pictures Images Photos Designs 2013

Cute Funny Jokes Free Pictures Images Photos Designs 2013

Cute Funny Jokes Free Pictures Images Photos Designs 2013

Cute Funny Jokes Free Pictures Images Photos Designs 2013

Cute Funny Jokes Free Pictures Images Photos Designs 2013

Cute Funny Jokes Free Pictures Images Photos Designs 2013

Cute Funny Jokes Free Pictures Images Photos Designs 2013

Cute Funny Jokes Free Pictures Images Photos Designs 2013

Cute Funny Jokes Free Pictures Images Photos Designs 2013

Cute Funny Jokes Free Pictures Images Photos Designs 2013

Cute Funny Jokes Free Pictures Images Photos Designs 2013

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